Friday, April 30, 2010

Guest Blogger...

Hello everybody! I have had some fabulous travel opportunities and will be out of the country next week and again later in May. In my absence, my brother will be guest blogging. He is a wonderful writer, so I hope he doesn't do too great of a job and raise your expectations. I will write when I get back, and hopefully have some great international corporate gypsy stories!

Monday, April 19, 2010

IT People...

We all have them, the IT people at our jobs. We all employ different strategies with them. Some of us bribe them with cookies and kindness, in hopes that when it's our laptop that dies, they might show some compassion. Others ignore them, until they are needed. Whatever path you take, I am willing to bet that you've had some sort of experience with yours.

I have had several run ins lately, and I have always taken the cookies/kindness route. I hate to be the one to tell you, it does not work. They do not have compassion. Or any other human emotions as far as I can tell.

A few months ago I was having a lot of problems with my laptop, which was pretty old. My boss told me to call "them" and tell them, to see if I could be bumped up on the "list" for an upgrade. Sounds simple enough, but the fact that I put two words in quotation marks says otherwise.

I call them, explain my issues, and ask about the upgrade list. "Ma'am, there is no list". Huh. "Okay, maybe it's not a formal list, but however you guys decide who is upgraded next". Long pause. "Miss, we really don't know". Okay, I'm losing it. You don't know. You have no idea in a company of thousands of people what order you upgrade laptops in. "Okay, you personally don't know, or are you saying as an IT department that no one knows?". I could not let it go.

Then he says to me, "No one knows". I'm done. "Okay, so in other words it's like ancient Greece and is there a goblet of fire that you put names written on pieces of paper in and the one that makes green smoke gets upgraded. Is that what you are saying?". Very long pause. "No, that's not what I'm saying". Click, I hang up.

Months later, I get the mystical email (and at this point, remember, we do not know how this happens) that I am indeed scheduled for an upgrade. I ship my laptop to them, and also back up everything (even though they tell me I don't have to) because I'm paranoid. If these people do not even know how things happen, certainly they can't be trusted with 7 years worth of documents and customer info.

I get the new laptop back. I fire it up. I have this false sense of confidence because they managed to keep the picture on my desktop, all my icons in the same place, amazing. Or so I think. I start clicking around. Email folders, gone. All documents, gone. The 300 software applications I have loaded, gone.

Near tears, I call. Now, I know that (thankfully) I have the data, but the thought of spending a few days and time I do not have getting it back in here is not appealing. I call "them". "They" could not be less concerned. They can't even fake it. Do not even say sorry.

No more cookies...

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Mr. Blue Bird on my Shoulder...

Have you ever just had the best day? I did once. It seemed like a normal day, I left the house and was on my way to visit clients. I had a slight headache, and took what I believed to be an ibuprofen.

As the day progressed, I enjoyed it more and more. I could not believe how awesome my life was. My clients were incredible, I talked to them maybe a little more than usual. I drove around, looking at the beautiful city, seeing new colors and beauty all around me.

I suddenly understood musicals. If I could sing, I would have burst into song at the wonder of it all. Wow, I thought, what a fantastic day!!

Later that afternoon, I was talking to my husband, telling him all about my fabulous day. He said, "Your pupils seem dilated". What?

Oh no. It was not a fantastic day. It was a regular day, pushed into the realm of greatness by a narcotic pain pill in my purse, leftover from a recent minor surgery.

And here I thought Uncle Remus was on to something...

I'm honestly not sure what element of this is more disturbing. My clients did not notice that big of a difference in me, or that I went through the entire day in an altered state and didn't notice myself.